This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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