Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
