I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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