awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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