That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
My balls are so social today.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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