haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
