Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
