Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
