Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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