nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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