part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
