I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize