You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
