DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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