everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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