Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Randomize