and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
