he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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