OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
