4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
