so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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