i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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