Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I know her cup size but not her name....
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
