Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
