the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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