I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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