If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Life is so much better after having sex.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize