Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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