I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
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