You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
