Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Randomize
