Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
