CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
