Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
