Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I just want nice things and good sex
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Randomize
