the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
