Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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