This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
