So drunk its hurt
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
