She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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