you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
