I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
