How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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