wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
People in love make me want to vomit
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize