Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
