its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize