Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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