Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
