I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
