I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize